I’ve been analyzing the different forms of family in Hollywood.
Obviously, the concept is not always traditional, often dysfunctional, but can actually be honorable. Family is what we make it. Us ordinary people may never entirely understand celebrities as people, or as life partners. However, we all understand a concept that, even when it doesn’t work out, always originates from love.
First Comes The Kids, Never Comes The Marriage
It’s no secret that many, if not most, parenting teams in Hollywood are not married. (Although, I guess common law kicks in eventually). Celebrity couples are extremely comfortable dating someone for a decade, reproducing, but never making it official with the court. It’s completely normal and not considered the least bit scandalous in the entertainment industry. Most celebrity marriages end in divorce anyway, so not marrying is almost the smart thing to do.
Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt are the best example, as they had/adopted 5 or 6 kids before tying the knot, which is now being untied. Ryan Gosling and Eva Mendes are not married, but are going on 5 years with two young daughters. Kylie Jenner just had a baby with Travis Scott, and we aren’t sure if it was planned or if they are even “together” at all. Her sis Kourtney K had 3 kids inside a decade long relationship with Scott Disick, marriage never being a topic of discussion. These examples do not even begin to complete the history of the wait-are-they-married-? co-parenting teams.
The latest trend in Hollywood is the surprise pregnancy. The kind of announcements that have the media and gossip consumers saying, “I didn’t know they were with anyone. Are they with someone?” Then asking, “Forreal, who are they with?” “Are they married, or what?” “Who is the father?” The only female celebrities who can get away with this are the ones who primarily keep their private life, well, private.
Mindy Kaling recently had her first child. Nobody realized she was dating. Rachel McAdams just announced her pregnancy, and she has only had “rumored” romances over the past few months. So, maybe… it was an accident? It was not planned? They are real people who decide to accept the real consequences of real mistakes, just like everyone else?
Or… They went another route by choice?
A Single Mom By Choice
AKA, THEY PULLED A SANDRA. Ya know, Sandra Bullock, the woman who, after being cheated on, declared independence and adopted her son as a single mother BY CHOICE. Adoption, sperm donors, and surrogates… these are all viable options for a woman who wants to become a mother, with or without a man. Many women end up freezing their eggs to protect their dreams of motherhood in case work and relationships don’t go the way they probably predicted. The moral of this long essay (which should be published in Cosmo or somewhere, don’t you think?) is that a woman’s maternal status does not depend on anything but her.