Is Snapchat Over?

More celebrities have jumped ship. Stocks are sinking.

I could live without Snap. Sue me.

Please know that I understand how dramatic and over analyzed this essay is. I also can’t comprehend how I have so many opinions about a single social media platform. I have yet to speak these words out loud. It’s not interesting enough to withstand a real conversation with real humans, but interesting enough to observe from other angles on my personal website where I can really highlight any issue I want. * Extra Loud Sigh * Sure – we could talk about gun control some more – or we could not do that.

First of all, I hate the little ghost guy (or girl, I guess?) that acts as the poster ghost for the app. I get that it’s their mascot and at least it’s not as random as the iconic Twitter egg, but it just reminds me of the Halloween emoji. The ghost was supposed to represent how quickly the Snaps disappear, but let’s be real, Snapchat is screenshot central these days. However, I do appreciate the screenshot notification they installed.

Second of all, it’s stressing me out. Now that Instagram has Insta stories (and pretty much everything else), why do we need Snap anyway? How do we know what to put on which story? What qualifies as story-worthy for each platform? Do we use the same story, or totally separate ones? I am so overwhelmed.

Third of all, I never knew if receiving a solo Snap sent directly to me meant that I had to respond. I’m not a selfie taker, and even if I were, I would waste so much time trying to look decent for the Snap back. It’s so much pressure deciding how to respond. If I respond with a text reaction, then I end up have a full text conversation on Snap that could have been done, well, over legit text. You know what I mean?

Celebrity Impact: Kylie Jenner straight up asked the world if they still used the application. Kylie Jenner is – unfortunately – considered hot and trendy. Rihanna butchered Snap’s stocks when she stood up for herself after the app made light of the domestic violence that went down between her and Chris Brown (Snap took a poll asking “Who would you rather slap?” That is horrible because Rihanna actually was slapped.) Just this week, Chrissy Teigen announced that she is done with Snap because of that very poll, and because of the new design.

The new design is chaos. The stories are mixed in with individual Snapping threads and the notifications. There seems to be no real order of events and I just, honestly, can’t.

The filters that make me look remarkably better are the only things I would truly miss about Snapchat. I am dead serious about that. Filters save lives. Can’t Instagram up their game regarding filters? They already stole the stories, they might as well steal the filters, and DEFINITELY include the dog one. Obviously.


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